Overanalyzing Anime Plots That Don’t Exist

Overanalyzing Anime Plots That Don’t Exist

So, bloggers like me, and possibly you, tend to overanalyze the hell out of things. This isn’t a coincidence, believe it or not. What we do, in my case at least, is write way too many words about the medium that is anime. This tends to involve overanalyzing certain aspects of it. Look at my episode reviews! That’s me talking about one episode for around 1000 words.

 

One of my more popular posts is me talking about the use of the slang term “sus” in an anime for a few thousand words. I do this crap all the time. So I thought it would be fun to make a post all about overanalyzing anime plots, but with one caveat: none of the plots exist.

 

You see, there’s this website that generates random anime plots for you. The way it does this is by taking a bunch of random sentences and stitching them together. It could start with “a villain who fights for their country” or “A hero whose friend convinces them to do…” something, and then the rest is random. It basically takes one or two lines explaining a character, what they do, and their situation, and craft a random plot from that.

 

Most of the time, you’ll recognize the plot points from popular series, like Redo of a Healer or Sword Art Online. You know, those two very well-known, very popular anime for the whole family. So I have a few plots I generated here, and I wanted to discuss what they could be about, and of course, name them. Let’s get started.

 

Story One:  I Was Forced to Join the Student Council Just to Become a Sacrifice for the Greater Good!?

Prompt: A student council member is selected based on computer analysis of traits and potential to find a suitable heir for the dying ruler of a country, but must become a willing sacrifice to accomplish this goal.

Kirito
(Close enough, right?)

 

I imagine this as an Isekai for some reason. So our hero is typical high school boy, Kazuto, um, Kaminari. See, Kazuto kind of sucks. It isn’t that he’s necessarily awful, but he ain’t winning any awards. He’s incredibly average in every single way. Everyone forgets about him right after they see him. He’s that type of guy.

 

This is why it’s especially surprising when he hears from the principal himself that he should join the student council. Everyone there is studious, obedient, competent, has bright futures ahead of them. Nothing like our boy Kazuto. Why would he join? Still, not wanting to get in trouble, Kazuto makes his way to the principal’s office to find out what the heck is going on.

 

But suddenly, the office begins to warp around him, and Kazuto passes out. When he awakes, he’s standing in a strange castle with a familiar face in front of him. It was the principal but wearing the garb of a king. “What the hell’s going on here?” Kazuto said normally. “Where arm I?” The king gave a hardly chuckle and told his tale.

 

It turns out that the principal was actually the king of another world, and the student council members were his royal knights. The plan was that one of them would take over the throne after he passed on, but that day was coming sooner than anyone had thought. The king was terminally ill with only a year left to live, and Kazuto was the only one who could save them all.

 

Using a computer program the programmer in the council created back in our world, they discovered that Kazuto was the only person capable of becoming the next king. Despite being extremely average, he had all the traits to become ruler, based on the algorithm. But there was one catch.

 

Accepting the throne meant accepting the great goddess’ soul into your body. While it doesn’t alter your body in any way, all of your memories beforehand are erased, effectively killing you. And so the series is about the principal king and his council knights as they try to convince Kazuto to kill himself to become king of this isekai world. Hey, I’d watch it.

 

Story Two: Is Killing my Family Really the Only Way to Clean up the High Seas!?

Prompt: A sassy pirate captain repays a debt to a crime boss by trying to infiltrate an enemy facility, but must kill a loved one to do so.

Drake FGO
(Use your imagination, people)

 

So this one involves a sassy pirate captain, who is named Drake, because why not. Also, she’s female. Think Drake from Fate Grand Order but sassier. You see, while sassiness can be endearing to some, it can also be dangerous for a pirate. Because you see, though Drake seemed to have complete control of the seas, there was one pirate crime boss more dangerous than her. His name was Purplebeard, and he controlled the drug cartel of the high seas.

 

Little known fact, but Drake hated drugs. She lost all her family but her sister to them. Faced with the crime boss, Purplebeard, Drake was overwhelmed with fury and sass. 

 

“What are YOU doing here?” Drake said with a hand on her hip. “This is my turf.”

 

But Purplebeard really didn’t care about anything like that. He stole from people all the time. He doesn’t care about who something belongs to. He was the drug lord of the high seas, for god’s sake! But Drake didn’t care. She continued to sass her way right onto Purplebeard’s hit list. 

 

After their battle, Drake was defeated miserably, but she still held her sass. She wouldn’t lose it, even at the cost of her life. However, Purplebeard considered himself a benevolent drug lord. He would let Drake go on one condition: she must sail to his brother Blackbeard’s secret ocean facility and steal the gold within.

 

They had a falling out with each other years ago about who got their father’s treasure after he passed. This caused Purplebeard to hate the bond between siblings as he never had a good one himself. That’s why Purplebeard attached one more problem to Drake’s journey.

 

During their battle, Purplebeard stabbed Drake with a knife coated in a mysterious drug. In only seven days, she will die. She can get the antidote in one of two ways: either she can go steal the treasure and complete Purplebeard’s mission or kill her own sister. Why? Uh, she has blood that works like a panacea. She never falls ill and can cure anything with her blood.

 

And so the story is about Drake sailing the high seas with her sister to defeat Blackbeard quickly, and with each passing day resisting the urge more and more to kill her only family to save herself.

 

That was a thing.

 

Story Three: Caught in the Middle of a Love Triangle and a War!? This isn’t How my Youth Romantic Comedy Was Supposed to go!!!

Prompt: A naive college student decides for an unknown reason to clear the name of a love interest who has been falsely accused of a crime, but is distracted by the plight of a small rebel society and by romantic involvement with their leader.

Plastic Memories
(Oh, I’m going to hell for this one)

 

This one is just a mess. I don’t know what the hell any of this means, but I’ll be damned if I won’t try. So this story takes place in the distant future. Not like super distant where the world ceases to exist, but like far enough where we have robots that can think for themselves. Dystopian android future and all that.

 

Well, our main character is, uh, M-Makoto, um, Natsunagi. You can’t prove I’m just ripping names from characters, damn it! I’ve been thinking here, staring for at least five solid minutes for that name. Makoto, like most young men his age, has love on his mind, and that’s all he’s been thinking about since he started college just a year ago. But there’s one problem for our hero. He’s the last human alive!

 

But that isn’t as big of an issue as you would think. He’s technically not human. He was bioengineered by the new androids in an attempt to create their creators who died out during the last war. Makoto is the closest they’ve gotten. Yet, he’s still attracted to robots and there’s this one girl, woo boy, does he have a thing for her motherboard.

 

He likes her so much, in fact, that he confessed his love. Her LED eyes lit up, and she beeped and booped right into Makoto’s heart. But, little did the love birds know, something big was coming, lurking in the shadows for the perfect time to strike.

 

One time on a day at the robo mall, Makoto’s life was changed forever. His newfound girlfriend bot went haywire! She started firing lasers out of her eyes, firing her machine gun arms. Oh, it was a nightmare. All the robots in the area were turned into little more than glorified toasters. Running away in terror, Makoto was suddenly pulled into a side street and knocked out. When he awoke, he saw something familiar but oh so mysterious. 

 

It was a human, but not just one. The entire room was full of humans. Humans bearing many more firearms than he was comfortable with, but humans all the same. The woman who greeted him wasn’t only beautiful. She had no motherboard in sight. Makoto was fascinated.

 

She explained that this camp contains all the failed experiments the robot had made when trying to create the perfect human. Unlike Makoto, they didn’t fit their mold. “Why are you are here?” Makoto asked, eyeing up the girl’s gun. 

 

“Because we have nowhere else to go,” she said, looking down. Makoto saw sadness in her eyes, and somehow, he knew she couldn’t be a bad person. You know, despite the weapons of death and destruction. “Our goal is to overthrow the robots. We want ‘our’ world back. And that robot you were with is the first step.”

 

Makoto was shocked. He has been so enamored with this rebel leader that he completely forgot about his robot girlfriend! 

 

“You see,” the leader began, “Look all throughout history, and you’ll find there’s one surefire way to take down a civilization. You destroy it from the inside out. We just put a little virus in her, and she’ll take care of the rest. Before you know it, they’ll all be at each other’s wires!”

 

“Wait!” Makoto yelled, “You framed her?”

 

“No, not really.” the leader said. “She did the crime.”

 

“It’s close enough!” Makoto very passionately explained why the robots deserved to live and why his girlfriend didn’t do anything wrong. “You need to clear her name!”

 

The leader approached Makoto slowly, flicking her hair in a strange way. We think she was trying to look cool and said, “We can’t do that.” Makoto’s heart fluttered, even knowing it was wrong.

 

And so the story is a dystopian future rom-com about a “human” boy who fell in love with both a female robot and “human,” except they’re both locked in a war. It’s up to him to prevent either of their deaths, but if he succeeds, just who will he choose?

 

Oh, my god. I’m so sorry. That was terrible. 

 

Thank you very much for reading

 

Forgive me for I have sinned.

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